[Must Read] Don’t Be a Sucka! 9 Ways Women Use Men!!
While some men don’t want to settle down and claim a girlfriend, most men don’t need any “girl…friends” either. After all, what man wants to just “hang out” with a beautiful woman? That’s what his boys are for. It’s totally possible for men and women to be platonic friends, but that’s not normally how it starts.
The man is attracted to a woman, he asks her out, and they spend time together. But then somewhere along the line, said man falls into the dreaded “friend zone”, or “akpoz zone” – and he has no idea how he got there. He’s not sure if she’s playing hard to get, or if he’s been hoodwinked – and while he’s trying to figure it all out, the woman knows exactly what she’s doing. If you’re not sure if you’re being played for a fool, here are some signs that she just might be using you. (And indications you’re a low-key user.)
1. You Are Her Personal Chauffeur
You have a car…she doesn’t. This is not a big deal, and being the gentleman you are, you have no problem picking her up for dates. But after a while, you’re not just picking her up to go to the movies. You’re driving her to work, to her doctor’s appointment and even to her friends’ house. As a matter of fact, she asks you to drive her AND her friends around – to the club, shop-rite, wherever. But she’s attractive, so you do it, even if it’s totally out of your way. The way you see it, she’ll think you’re such a nice guy that she might even invite you INSIDE of her home one day.
But she doesn’t, and you barely get a kiss on the cheek for all of the gas you’ve burnt up. If she’s given you ZERO indication that she’s even remotely physically attracted to you, then she’s using you for a ride. Unless you’ve at least gotten to second base, keep your car parked and let her figure out how to get around herself, and and as Fashola don ban bike, she go dey treck or enta bus like her mates.
2. You’re Her Flunky
It’s not enough that you drive her around, but sometimes she sends you out WITHOUT HER to run her errands. She asks you, in that ever so sweet voice of hers, to pick up her dry cleaning “since it’s on your way home.” She has to work late, so she wants to know if you’d be a dear and walk her precious dog for her. And you do it, because you figure that’s what a good boyfriend would do, right? Right.
Problem is, you’re not her boyfriend, you’re her errand boy; and any hopes you had of becoming her boyfriend went out the window along with your dignity. She’s not going to date you because she doesn’t respect you. Some women don’t like a guy who does whatever she says or who she can walk all over. What you see as kindness, she may view as weakness. It’s sad but true. There’s nothing wrong with being a good friend, if that’s all you want to be. But if you want more, and she’s not giving it to you, despite all of your good intentions, then bounce…and let her hire an assistant.
3. You Are Her “Go-To” Date
In the beginning, it’s expected that all of your dates should take place outside of each of your homes. After all, you don’t want to be too presumptuous. But after a few months, you should at least expect her to invite you over to her place for dinner, Netflix…something. You figure maybe she has roommates, so you invite her over to your place – but she always seems to need to wash and twist her hair. If you find that she only wants to go OUT – to the movies, a concert or to her favorite restaurant, chances are she just wants to get out of the house and you are her “go-to” date. Every time she calls, you’re always available…probably because you sit around waiting for your phone to ring. She knows this, and she also knows that you will do anything to be in her presence. If she’s always busy when you invite her to your crib or you’ve never seen the inside of her place, then she probably doesn’t want to be anywhere where something could jump off…and she’d have to turn you down. Just once or twice, be busy when she calls or tell her “no” to an outside date and see how she reacts. If she’s bent out of shape or stops calling, then you’ll know she’s probably not that into you.
5. You Pay For ALL Dates
Not only are you her “go-to” date – you also PAY for ALL of the dates. She might buy you a candy bar or a soda at the movies, or even gala or agbado sisun while you both take evening…but usually you are the one coming out-of-pocket, whether that means spending 7-12k on dinner or a grip on Night of a thousand laff concert tickets. Some women expect men to pay for all dates, and some men even agree with that. But you shouldn’t be going broke while you’re trying to figure if she actually even likes you. If you’ve got the means to stick it out until she magically falls in love with you, then rock on. But if you have to take out a small loan just to keep courting this woman, while she NEVER ever offers to pay for coffee, then stop…now. See how long she wants to “date” you when you tell her that you forgot your wallet.
So far this tips can get you by, let these lines guide…Keep logged for the rest soon.